Tuesday, September 8, 2015
Friday, August 21, 2015
Bad Feminist by Roxane Gay
When Less Is MoreI should love Orange is the New Black for the same reason I should (but do not) love Red Tails or The Butler or 42. Here is po;ular culture about people who look like me. Thats all I should need, right? Why are we still talking about Orange Is the New Black? The conversation is a measure of how much we are forced to settle, or, perhaps, how much we're willing to settle.
How to Be Friends with Another Woman
3. If you are the kind of woman who says, "I'm mostly friends with guys," and act like you're proud of that, like that makes you closer to being a man or something and less of a woman as if being a woman is a bad thin, see ITem 1B. It's okay if most of your friends are guys, but if you champion this as a commentary on the nature of female friendships, well, soul-search a little.
3A. If you feel like it's hard to be friends with women, consider that maybe women aren't the problem. Maybe it's just you.
3B. I used to be this kind of woman. I'm sorry to judge.
5B. If you and your friend(s) are in the same field and you can collaborate or help each other, do this without shame. It's not your fault your friends are awesome. Men invented nepotism and practically live by it. It's okay for women to do it too.
9. Don't let your friends buy ugly outfits or accessories you don't want to look at when you hang out. This is just common sense.
The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
"I didn't know that other people thought things abou tme. I didn't know that they looked. And I started to cry. And nobody in that room looked at me weird for doing it. And then I really started to cry."
" I wonder if it's all a lie. A permanent record, I mean."
"You ever think, Charlie, that our group is the same as any other group like the football team? And the only real difference between us is what we wear and why we wear it?"
"There were other stories and other names. By the end, all I could think was what these people must feel like when they go to their class reunions. I wonder if they're embarrassed, and I wonder if that's a small price to pay for being a legend."
"It's strange to describe reading a book as a really great experience, but that's kind of how it felt. ...It wasn't like you had to search for the philosophy. It was pretty straightforward, I thought, and the great part is that I took what the author wrote about and put it in terms of my own life. Maybe that's what being a filter means. I'm not sure. ...'I would die for you. But I won't live for you.' Something like that. I think the idea is that every person has to live for his or her own life and then make the choice to share it with other people. Maybe that is what makes people 'participate.' I'm not really certain."
"I didn't say anything for a while because I didn't know what to say. And that was that. He just let me hear what he had to say in my own way and let things be. That was probably the best part."
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
Tomboy by Liz Prince
"It was seeming less and less likely that I would become a boy, but I'd never considered that I was becoming a woman. I guess my grasp of biology wasn't so great in 6th grade."
On cheerleaders and double standards:
"A boy can be celebrated because of his personality and talents, regardless of how he looks. In fact, talent can make a guy attractive who may not be by traditional standards. (long hair, scraggly chin pubes, kinda scrawny)"
"But a girl is usually only popular if she looks good. (well groomed hair, blemishless face, perfect teeth, willingness to wear revealing clothing)"
"I wanted to be celebrated for being funny and a good artist. Of course I wanted to look good too, but on my own terms. (do nothing hair, zits-a-plenty, baggy boys clothes)"
On sexually- oriented bullying:
"Don't make me prove how much of a man I am....Just kidding, Don't get your hopes up, stupid."
"The stereotype of the butch lesbian has plagued me my whole life, but I didn't dress like a boy to attract girls: I dress like a boy because it feels natural to me. I wasn't against being gay. I was against being bullied. And I was tired of having these false labels applied to me."
Perhaps my favorite simple scene takes place between Liz and her mentor, Harley, who publishes a zine and offers to meet regularly for writing sessions. This exchange really resonates, because it's so simple in its complexity. There is so much truth and heartbreak in these subjects.
"I was thinking about how (I'm) different from other girls. And how we used to talk about hating girls, and that I maybe wasn't supposed to be one."
"What makes you thin you aren't meant to be a girl?"
"Well, do I look like a girl? I don't wear make-up and dresses!"
"Sure, but those things don't define a girl."
"It's more than the clothes though, it's like girls are expected to act a way that I don't like."
"It's an interesting idea, but I would challenge you to decide: Do you hate girls? Or do you hate the expectations put on girls by society?"
"Is there a difference?"
see also: swimming in tshirts, ghostbusters, chasing boys to kiss them, girl scouts, little league, third wheel
Not That Kind of Girl by Lena Dunham
...This is what it could have been like. This is what it had never been like. And so I was angry. ...After the best night we had ever had, the first night he'd let me feel like myself, I wrote him an email sayin ghe had hurt me, taken adventage of my affection, and made me feel disposable. I told him that I wouldn't be available any longer. And then I made myself sick to my stomach waiting for an apology that never came."
"My mother understood, implicitly, the power of it. See these hips, these teeth, these eyebrows, these stockings that bunch and sag at the ankles? They're worth capturing, holding on to forever. I'll never be this young again. Or this lonely. Or this hairy. Come one, come all, to my private show."
"We talk about enlightened beings, what it would mean to transcend the human plane. 'I want to be enlightened, but it also sounds boring,' I tell him. "So much of what I love -- gossip and furniture and food and the Internet -- are really here, on earth." Then I say something that would probably make the Buddha roll over in his grave: 'I think I could be enlightened, but I'm not in the mood yet.'"
On running away:
"Soon you will find yourself in more and more situations you don't want to run from. At work you'll realize that you've spent the entire day in your body, really in it, not imagining what you look like to the people who surround you but just being who you are You are a tool being put to its proper use. THat Changes a lot of things. ...Sometimes that old feeling slips back in. OF being invaded and misunderstood. Of being outside your body but still in the room... You used to own the night and put it to good use. Is togetherness killing your productivity? When's the last time you stayed up until 4:00A.M. testing the boundaries of your consciousness and Googling serial killers? ...But you remember how hard it was, that moment between wakefulness and sleep. how the moment of settling down was almost physically painful, your mind pulling away from your body like a balloon being sucked into the atmosphere. ...People need sleep. You've learned a new rule and it's simple: don't put yourself in situations you'd like to run away from. But when you run, run back to yourself..."
Saturday, May 23, 2015
The Girl in 6E by AR Torre
Wednesday, May 20, 2015
2.333 years later...
I'm attempting a return. As I look at my 2012 "proverbial nightstand" books, I have read exactly 5.5 of those listed. Before it gets updated, I'll briefly comment randomly on a few...
- Paradox of Choice is literally sitting on my bedside table at this very moment.
- Due to highly emotional events, Freedom is waiting for the perfect chunk of time to devote to reminiscing and digesting.
- Toni Morrison's Mercy disappointed me, and I haven't returned to her since.
- Three Lives was fantastic (as Gertrude always is).
- Michael Connelly is now a bona fide favorite. Thrillers, in general, are garnering quite a bit of my attention. Guilty pleasures no longer exist for me in "pop" culture. No guilt in leisure or entertainment.
- Since leaving teaching, authors like Sharon Creech and Lois Lowry don't populate my everyday.
Whether I post actual reviews of every book read, or just list titles and write about those that truly strike me is yet to be determined.
Earlier this year I found #The100DayProject, deciding to make something tangible (or work on making those somethings) every single day. While I'm no longer struggling with the daily part, I have once again come to value accountability when it comes to creativity. (Random tangential update: I'm now gainfully employed as an actor and a producer. As that is now my "work," performing and/or rehearsal does not count. Though it is making and creating, it seems to be a cheat.)
Recently I've also been reviewing my journals and notebooks. My collection spans back to 1996 and has seen many seasons of depth, frequency, and subjects. Lately everything seems to be related to teaching class, rehearsal, and show notes....as evidenced by my clunky use of bullet points, parenthesis, and verb tenses above. While I don't have any ultimate goals with this, I'd like to once again be a writer. Developing the practice will hopefully inspire things bigger and brighter.
(Lies: I've never written a philosophy of education paper. Ditto on the craft of acting. Now that I'm again teaching improv, it's high time I not only be able to articulate my own notions on one or the other, but succinctly define my own theoretical basis for each thing.)
(apropos, as Allende is one of my favorites)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)